Bring On The New Year!

I really don’t get into New Year’s resolutions.  If I call it that, it is almost like giving myself permission to do what most often happens with resolutions – QUIT.  However, it seems to be a great time to look back on the past year and to look forward to the new one.  I like fresh starts!  The last day of 2009 was awesome.  We were down in Texas spending time with my wife’s parents, who live next to Lake Brownwood.

On New Year’s Eve, I got up early and spent some great time with God.  In addition to Bible study and praying, I spent some time thinking back on all He had taught me throughout the year and all that had taken place.  I also spent some time praying and reflecting on how I want / need to grow in 2010.  Among these are to read through the Bible again (and not with the goal of getting through the Bible, but getting the Bible through me) and to memorize a verse per week, beginning with Psalm 91, which I have adopted as my theme passage for the year.  I will share one more of my goals for this year with you, and won’t bore you with the rest.  My mentor has the goal each year of making it the best year in his marriage, from his wife’s perspective.  I have adopted this goal for the year, as well.  I want my wife to be able to say that this is the best year of our marriage.  If I can say it, and she can’t, that means I have been selfish.  God has been teaching me that selfishness has no place in marriage (or anywhere else, for that matter), and this will be a great exercise in selflessness.

Later in the morning on New Year’s Eve, my oldest daughter wanted to get out and drive the golf cart, so she drove the other three kids and I down to the Lake.  We spent a good 30 minutes or so skipping rocks across the channel.  We were having a blast.  One of the girls brought me a piece of a clam shell that was sort of pearl colored and shiny, and it was in the shape of a heart.  Just the day before, as I was finishing up my study of Malachi, I had read the verses in Chapter 4 where it says that the prophet Elijah will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.  I kept the piece of shell as a reminder.  As God always does when He wants to drive a point home with me, He re-enforced this teaching by leading me to study the book of Luke next.  This morning, I read Chapter 1, verse 17:  “And he (John the Baptist) will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous – to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.”  I got chills when I read this verse.  God is reminding me to not neglect my own children as I minister to others, and I believe it is a confirmation in what I am doing to try to encourage other men in their fathering.  It also encourages me to take advantage of the opportunities God is giving me to help others grow spiritually.  I love when God does this!

After our rock-skipping adventure, my wife and I left the kids with her parents and went on a date.  We saw the movie, “The Blind Side,” and I highly recommend it.  It is based on a true story of how a family took in a fatherless child and made a huge difference in his life.  Those of you who know me know why I like this movie so much.  I have such a heart for those children whose Dad can’t or won’t be a part of their lives.  Anyway, we went for a late lunch after the movie.  We had a great visit over a Schlotsky’s sandwich and soup.  This was one of our favorite places to eat early on in our relationship, and it brought back great memories.  After that, we went shopping and then went back to rescue the grandparents.  Later that evening, the kids opened gifts from my wife’s siblings.  You probably heard the scream clear up here in Kansas when they opened up their Wii.   Anyway, it was a great way to end the year.  We got the Wii hooked up last night, and some of us are a little sore today (yes, even I played… LOL).

I am so excited about what God has in store for 2010.  I want to apply Psalm 91:1 (typing from memory since this is my memory verse for the week): “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.”

May God bless you as you seek Him in 2010!

Spiritual Retreat

It is a beautiful day.  The rain has cleared and the sun is shining.  It was a perfect day for my spiritual retreat.  I rode my bike down the Jim Martinez Sunflower Trail.  I have a couple of favorite spots by the Arkansas River where I stop to spend time with God.  I had some great time of seeking God and listening.

Awhile back, during another spiritual retreat day, I asked God what His vision for my life was.  I believe that answer is becoming more and more clear as I have been spending time seeking Him and listening.  As I have been reading through the book of Nehemiah, I sense an urging to become a repairer of the breach that has taken place in families.  This includes leading men to be better spiritual leaders, husbands and fathers, helping people to grow spiritually and teaching them how to pursue God (after all, His Holy Spirit is our “in-house” Counselor!), helping strengthen marriages and families, and by standing in the gap for single parent families.  I’m not so arrogant as to think I’m perfect and can do all of this myself or in my own strength.  In fact, the whole thought of it kind of overwhelms me.  However, I am available for however God wants to use me.

I believe that all of the ministries that I’m responsible for can be aligned under this key vision of building the wall and repairing the breaches that are happening in families.  God is teaching me a lot about leadership, which will be crucial as I lead teams in making this happen.  He is also leading me toward getting more training in couseling.  My heart is wide open to His wisdom and leading.  Speak Lord, for your servant is listening.

May God bless your family!

My Shadow

I’ll try to start back with Nehemiah tomorrow.  My brain is too tired for anything profound tonight.  I just had to post about the day my son and I had together.  It was awesome.  I started my day a little later than normal, and didn’t start with Bible study and prayer as usual because I needed to get some meat on the smoker as early as possible so it would be ready for dinner.  So, by the time I sat down to have my time with God, he was up.  Before I knew it, he was coming out the back door with his Bible.  Unfortunately, he was still in his pajamas and barefooted.  I told him to go back in and get dressed and then come join me.  By the time he was dressed he had decided to go get his tractor out instead.  I was kicking myself for not allowing him to come on out.  I’m afraid I missed an opportunity.  Anyway, my heart was so filled with joy to see him coming out with his Bible.

I’ve been trying a new smoker out this weekend to see if I want to buy it.  So, I smoked some brisket for a friend and some beef ribs for us today.  Before I knew it, my son had brought up a little play stove from downstairs and was calling it his smoker and had on his garden gloves to copy my “smoking gloves.”

Basically, he did everything I did today.  In addition to the above, we went to Lowe’s, Ace, and Home Depot (that’s what I call a shopping trip), and I could hardly peel him away from the John Deere lawn tractors!  When we got home, we moved a dresser together.  He got on one end of a drawer and I got on the other.  It took awhile to move a drawer that way, but he thought he was big stuff.   After that, we mowed the yard, and then came in pretty much exhausted and covered in cottonwood pollen.  It looked like I had either sheared some sheep or run over a few hundred Bichon Frise’s in the yard when we were done, and that was with a grasscatcher!!

We topped off the day by eating beef ribs, baked beans, potato salad and then rhubarb crisp with vanilla ice cream.

My little shadow was trying to fall asleep at dinner, so I gave him a bath and sat in the recliner with him.  He was asleep in 5 minutes.    We had a great day.  It’s humbling how much he is trying to be like me.  It is a huge responsibility, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

May God bless you as  you set the example for those little ones around you!

Thirty-seven

Something hit me on May 2 when I turned 37.  It’s not usually a number that one would focus on.  It’s not one of the so-called “milestone” years.  However, something deep inside me says that 37  is going to be a significant year.  God has already been teaching me a great deal.  He has reminded me in gentle but firm ways that I need to be pursuing intimacy with Him first and foremost.  I have missed very few early morning hours with God over the past several years.  However, my journaling while spending time with God has dwindled to a few times a week.  Without my journal right there with me, my mind tends to wander, I tend to forget things that I really need to be praying about, and I don’t listen nearly as well.  In addition, I don’t have a way of going back to review what God has been teaching me.  When I use the journaling method that Dean Trune taught me, I am able to stay focused and my time with God is much richer and more meaningful.  Now, please don’t get me wrong.  I know I can pursue God and spend time with him any time of the day, no matter where I am, and whether I journal or not.  However, in order for me to really be focused and listening, I need to spend early morning, uninterrupted time with Him, and have my journal right there with me.  So far, I have journaled all 20 days of my 37th year, and I’m excited about what God is doing in my heart.

It is also helping that I’m going to bed earlier, so I can get up closer to 5:00 and have some time of exercise, too.  I feel so much more energetic when I have my time with God and some good exercise.  This morning, after my quiet time, I spent 15 minutes on the treadmill while watching a John Maxwell leadership video.  I have to do something while treadmilling or I can’t hardly stand it.   Today is the last day of school, so I can get part of my exercise by riding my bike to the office at least a few times a week.  So far, with the exception of the day I found water coming into our basement, I have stayed on course with my exercise plan since turning 37.  That’s huge for me.

Another thing that will make this a significant year is the fact that God is really teaching me some leadership skills right now.  Much of it is coming straight from the book of Nehemiah.  I’m planning to focus on a chapter of Nehemiah each day for the next thirteen days.  I’ll try to share what God is teaching me.  Today, I’ll talk about Chapter 1.

I am so impressed with what an incredible leader Nehemiah was!  I don’t know why I haven’t focused on him before.  He learns of a need that burdens his heart to the point of weeping.  Instead of going out on his own power to find a solution, he spends three or four months in prayer and fasting to God.  Take note:  prayer was his first action, not his last resort.  Oh, what power we would see as leaders if we would learn this.  His recorded prayer is so meaningful and powerful, complete with worship, confession (his sins and those of Israel), and petition, and it came straight from his heart.  One of my favorite parts is where he says “O Lord, let your ears be attentive to the prayer of this your servant and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name.”  What would it look like for us to come together in prayer because we delight in revering God’s name?  Wow!

Another thing that has been brought to my attention is the fact that Nehemiah was very close to the king.  In fact, according to Dr. Howard Hendricks, a Bible professor specializing in Christian leadership at Dallas Theological Seminary, the cupbearer was second-in-command, kind of like the Prime Minister.  He was the only one who had direct access to the king and his own expense account.  In other words, he was living the good life in the palace.  In the world’s eyes, it would have been so easy to ignore the need in Jerusalem in order to continue living in comfort, but servant-leaders don’t do that.  Servant leaders seek God and put the needs of others before their own.

When I read and study the Bible, I always ask the question:  What is God teaching me through this?  How can this be applied in my life?  Well, I, too, have had a burden placed on my heart by God.  It’s not a physical wall that is broken down, but can be compared to that.  It’s the state of marriage and family.  I think the state of many marriages and families are much like the state of Jerusalem:  “in great trouble and disgrace because the walls are broken down and the gates have been burned with fire.”  Success rises and falls on the leadership, and that includes leadership in the family.  I believe that we, as men, are supposed to be spiritual leaders in the home.  We are supposed to be the gatekeepers, providing protection and security by staying close to God.  This includes praying for our families and fighting the spiritual battles through prayer and God’s Word.  I’m not saying that women can’t do this because they can and are usually very capable, but it should be done in addition to what their husbands are doing.  Too often, women find themselves as the spiritual leader because their husbands don’t step up.  I really believe it’s because they aren’t equipped.  Often, without the spiritual leadership of the husband, marriages fall apart, and families find themselves in a place of insecurity because the protective walls are broken down. 

As most of you know, I have a heart for ministry to single parent families.   I have a real burden for helping rebuild the walls, and standing in the gap that has been left most often by the father.  At the same time, I have a heart for counseling families and helping men become better leaders in their homes.  In these ways, maybe we can repair the walls before they disintegrate.  I want to continue to develop my skills in these areas.  My animal science degrees did not prepare me for this, although my mentor in college taught me skills that went far beyond the degree.  Through Nehemiah’s example, I plan to take time this summer in prayer and fasting for God to give me a vision for how best to do this.  I’m afraid I have tried for too long to do this in my own power and without the proper leadership skills being developed.  I’m finally on track. 

This will also be a good preparation for my first overseas mission trip to Thailand to minister to Karen refugees, including a village of mostly single moms and widows.  Yep, 37 is going to be a significant year in the Lord!

For you single moms who read my blog, remember:  Even though the walls may be knocked down, and  you may feel discouraged at times, take courage in Psalm 68:5 – “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling.”  The King of Kings and the Lord of Lords is your protector and shield.

May God bless you as you spend time seeking Him and His vision for you!

Being Intentional

That seems to be the area where God is teaching me right now.  My spiritual mentor mentioned the idea of living intentionally a few weeks ago, and it has come up several times since then.  In fact, it goes right along with my post a few weeks ago, Stay the Course.

As some of you may have read on my blog awhile back, I am totally enamored with dog sledding, especially with the Iditarod, which officially ended yesterday with rookie Timothy Hunt blowing out the “Widow’s Lamp,” signifying that all mushers and their dog teams are safely off the Iditarod Trail.  This took place 15 days, 14 hours, and 6 minutes after the race started.  Lance Mackey won the race several days ago in an incredible 9 days, 21 hours, and 38 minutes.  This year, 52 out of the 67 mushers finished the race.  Unfortunately, my friend and rookie to the Iditarod, Kurt Reich, who I committed to pray for every Friday (and way more often during the race) was not able to make it to the finish line.  I’m anxious to talk to him to learn about his experience.  My guess is that being a Christian, he learned more in his 400 miles on the trail about himself, about his dogs, about life, and most importantly, about God than many of them learned in the full 1150 miles.  I believe just to compete in the Iditarod takes incredible courage and perseverance.  This is not a walk in the park.  It is known as the Last Great Race On Earth for a very good reason.  Here is how it is described on the Iditarod Official Website:

You can’t compare it to any other competitive event in the world! A race over 1150 miles of the roughest, most beautiful terrain Mother Nature has to offer. She throws jagged mountain ranges, frozen river, dense forest, desolate tundra and miles of windswept coast at the mushers and their dog teams. Add to that temperatures far below zero, winds that can cause a complete loss of visibility, the hazards of overflow, long hours of darkness and treacherous climbs and side hills, and you have the Iditarod. A race extraordinaire, a race only possible in Alaska.  From Anchorage, in south central Alaska, to Nome on the western Bering Sea coast, each team of 12 to 16 dogs and their musher cover over 1150 miles in 10 to 17 days.

Doesn’t that just make you want to begin training right away???  Okay, me either.  I would die, no questions asked…  However, there is something about it that just gets my heart to racing. 

Now, I give you this information to preface what I want to say about intentional living.  The mushers who enter the Iditarod know that they must be intentional.  This could mean life or death for them and their teams.  I read a blog entry not long ago that said the mushers who are totally focused on Nome will usually fail because they don’t focus on the day to day details that will get them to Nome.  Yes, they must have a vision for making it to Nome in order to condition themselves and their dogs properly and to prepare for the supplies they would need.  It would be complete foolishness to only take enough supplies to make it to the first checkpoint.  There is a lot that goes into the planning, including making sure the funds are there to see them through to completion, which I’ve been told is over $20,000.  I’m guessing that doesn’t include the cost of feeding and caring for the dogs throughout the year.  However, once the race begins, they must take one day at a time, one checkpoint at a time.  They have to be intentional about when they run and when they rest.  They have to strategize when they will take their mandatory 24 hour layover.  They have to plan how they will feed the dogs and when they give them snacks, etc…  They must plan well, including preparing for things that might happen.

It is much like life.  Our lives are full of checkpoints, and we must live intentionally to make it to each checkpoint in good condition so that we will have a glorious finish to the race.  We must also be intentional in making sure those we are leading make it there in good condition.  For instance, I as a husband and father, must never leave my family out in the cold and unprotected.  We must all make it to each checkpoint safely.  As leaders, we must be prepared for things that might happen along the way, but not live in worry of them.  Each of us will finish the race at different times, but each will finish.  Some will have shorter races than others, but they still must plan because we never know.  I ‘m sure you’re like me, and you want to finish well.  It’s not how we start the race that counts, but how we finish.  We can start living intentionally this very minute.  Again, if Kurt takes with him what he learned in his 400 miles and applies it to the rest of his life, it will all be worth it.  For him, this was just a segment in the great race of life, and I commend him for having the guts to give it a try.

Yesterday, I took my spiritual retreat day to spend time with God and listen to Him.  Since I have sensed God teaching me about intentional living, I decided to ask Him four questions at the beginning of the day.  I’ll share three of them with you here that are relevant to this post.  I’ll share the other one in a different post.

1.  What is Your vision for my life:  for me personally, for our family, and for the ministries you’ve entrusted to me?

2.  How can I live intentionally in order for these visions to become reality?

3.  What do I need to keep doing, start doing, stop doing, or change the way I’m doing?

I’ve heard it said that on every tombstone there is a “date born” and eventually there will be a “date died”.  Every tombstone has a dash in between the two dates, and that is what’s important.  It’s what we do in that “dash” we call life that really counts.  It is in the dash where legacies are formed because the end is too late.

Let me close with this passage to encourage you today:

Hebrews 12:1-3 – Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Much like the Iditarod, life has it’s share of hostility and things we must endure.  However, if we can look past that, there is an incredible beauty that God has given all around us.  Let’s keep our eyes fixed on Jesus and run with endurance the race that is before us, and do so intentionally. 

May God richly bless you, as you live intentionally and for His glory!

 

Stay the Course

I had a very interesting experience as a substitute teacher last Friday.  I took the assignment of going to the juvenile detention facility.  Contrary to what you might think, it was one of the easiest days I’ve had yet as a substitute.  I was there along with two other teachers, and we had twelve students.  In addition, there were three guards with us to make sure nothing happened.  With it being a Friday, the students wanted to be on their best behavior so they would have weekend privileges.  In many ways, it was much easier than being in the regular classroom.

I couldn’t help but wander about their stories.  Why were they there?  What was their home-life like?  Do they have dads in their lives who care?  How can I help?  My heart was breaking for them. 

One of the guys told me that between 5 and 10% of the youth who came there listed the father as “unknown.”  He also told me that well over half of them came from single parent families.  I’m guessing that 90% or more of them don’t have a good relationship with their dads, no matter if they are from a single parent or two parent home.  I felt like I was witnessing another consequence of fatherlessness in a very up-close way.  I really believe that most of them would turn things around if they had a good mentor, a father figure… at least someone in their life who cared.

Now, let’s spin the globe to the other side.  This morning, four of us met to talk about the trip to Thailand in October.  I learned more information about the village of Tee Po Kwah.  This is the village I spoke of awhile back that consists mostly of single parent families and widows.  I had assumed that the men were dying at the hands of the Burmese army, couldn’t get out of Burma to be with their families, or were trying to find work somewhere.  Unfortunately, much to my dismay, I learned that a great many of them had abandoned their families to find new wives and had succumbed to many of the same temptations that the men of America have.  It is a grim reminder that fatherlessness is a universal problem.  

I feel like God has placed me here for such a time as this.  I want to be used by God to stand in the gap and help hurting families, and to be on the frontlines of the battle against fatherlessness.  I often marvel at how He has brought me from a career as a meat scientist to being a minister and has giving me my heart’s desire of showing Christ’s love to people.  I have the greatest job on earth, as far as I’m concerned.  I get to carry out my life mission of ministering to single parent families locally, and it looks like I will get the chance to do this in Thailand in October, as well.  At the same time, I have opportunities to help strengthen marriages and minister to men, so maybe there will be fewer single parent families.  Not to mention, I have been given the privilege of leading and helping lead other ministries, such as the Small Group, Outreach and Shepherding ministries.  I pretty much get to minister to people of all ages at one time or another in the church and in the community.

If that wasn’t great enough, God has allowed me a unique way to minister to my own children, as well.  I get to teach chapel two days a week at the school where my daughters attend.  I can walk downstairs three days a week and have lunch with them, and I even get to substitute teach in their classes from time to time.  I know each of their teachers and see them daily when school is in session.  While we often have a busy schedule, I’m still home more than I was when I worked in the meat industry, and I’m at least home most evenings to help put them to bed.  This is so important to me because if I don’t father my own children and take care of my family well, everything else will be for nothing.   

Now, I say all this only to add this:  I’m thrilled where God has me, but I don’t want to just settle here.  I want to continue to grow.  I want to get more education in counseling so I can minister to people more effectively.  I need more ammunition for the battle, and I’m seeking God’s wisdom and guidance in how to do this.

Yesterday morning, in my time with God, this phrase came to my mind, “Moving from rhetoric to reality requires resolve.”  I don’t think I’ve ever heard this phrase before, but it sounds too complex to actually have come from me, so I’ll just give credit to God.  We need to get past fancy and glittery words and move toward actions.  It’s easy to say we will do something, but it takes resolve to make it happen.  We must be purposeful and intentional, and remember it won’t happen overnight.  Of course, it won’t happen at all, if we don’t come up with a game-plan and stick with it.  Just like with my Ten Key Moves.  If I write them down and don’t act on them, they will go down as more useless rhetoric.  Rhetoric doesn’t change lives and make a difference, action does.  With so much to do, I often get distracted from staying the course.  It seems like good things keep popping up that I allow to keep me from the best things.  That’s why it’s so important to put God first and listen to Him constantly.  When the children of Israel listened to God and obeyed, amazing things happened.  When they didn’t, disaster occurred.  I don’t know about you, but I want God’s best, not what I think is the best.  Let’s stay the course…

May God give us all the resolve to stick with the gameplan He has given us!

Ten Key Moves – Spiritual Leadership

I have had a lot of hits the past several days on my Ten Key Moves posts.  Being familiar with the Men’s Fraternity schedule, this doesn’t surprise me.  I am thankful for this because it has encouraged me to get out my list and take some time to review and reflect.  By the way, you can read all of the key moves I’ve written about under the category on my home page “10 Key Moves.”  Thanks for reading.

In reviewing my list, I see that I left out something very critical.  It’s something I’ve been working on, but is not on my list.  It has to do with my spiritual leadership at home, and I’m adding it now to be stated like this, “I will continue to grow so I will be a strong spiritual leader in my home.  I will lead family devotion and prayer times.  I will pray with my wife and children individually on a regular basis.  I will take every opportunity to teach and to lead by example, including finding opportunities for us to serve together.  I will encourage my family to pursue God individually, utilizing the spiritual disciplines that He has given us.”

In order for this to happen, I must be passionately pursuing God.  I cannot lead my family or anyone else spiritually if I am not growing.  In addition, I have to make it happen by setting aside a regular time and place where we will come together for family devotions and prayer.  Otherwise, it will be too easy to let other things take priority.

In my sermon this past Sunday I spoke about the need to be a disciple in order to make disciples.  An older couple in our church told me afterward that their 40 year old son told them that he remembers seeing his dad reading the Bible at the kitchen table and said it made such an impact on him.  That made me stop and think.  My time with God is usually spent in the early morning hours down in our basement before my family is even awake…

Okay.  With all this said, I would like to share something that I learned while preparing for my sermon.  I’ll give you the shortened version.  Have you ever heard the term “the apple of the eye?”  Usually, it is an endearing term used for someone we care about a lot, especially one of our children.   It can be found in the Bible in about four places, depending on what version you look at:  Deuteronomy 32:10, Psalm 17:8, Proverbs 7:2, and Zechariah 2:8.  Interestingly enough, it can also be translated “the pupil of the eye.”  It comes from the Hebrew phrase iyshown ayin, which means “little man of the eye.”  Have you ever looked into the pupil of someone’s eye.  You will see a small image of yourself.  In English the word pupil comes from the Latin word pupilla, or doll, which is derived from pupus or pupa (boy or girl, respectively).  Therefore, we use the term pupil to mean a student (small version of the teacher) or the black part of the eye where we see a reflection of our own image. 

I learned this as I was studying what it meant to be a disciple.  One of the definitions given for disciple is pupil.  As the word pupil means “little man of the eye” in Hebrew, we need to become little versions of our teacher (little men of our teacher’s eye).  That is what it means to become a disciple.  We should be so close to our Teacher that, in a spiritual sense, we can see our reflection in His eyes.  In addition, He should see Himself reflected in our lives.  In Jesus’ time, a disciple was one who was trying to become like his Rabbi in every sense.  He would not only be trying to gain knowledge, but would try to do everything the Rabbi did.  As disciples of Jesus, we need to learn to be like Him in every sense.  We need to have the knowledge, but we also need to live like He lived, doing the things He did.  When we do this, then we are equipped to make disciples, and it begins in our homes.

May God bless you as you seek to be a true disciple of Jesus Christ and lead others to do the same!

Tools, Tools, Tools

Nothing too deep today.  Just a story to share.  It was just my little guy and me at home last night, as the girls all had other things going on.  I decided to hang a mirror in the kids’ bathroom that we purchased on Saturday.  It was so cool because we found the perfect mirror that would tilt down for the kids, and it was on clearance at Lowe’s for 50% off!   We were finding that one mirror was not enough for three girls when they were all trying to brush hair, teeth, etc… in the mornings to get ready for school or church.  Imagine that!

So, I started getting all the tools together – drill and bit set, level, screwdriver, tape measure, hammer…  Yes, I needed a hammer to install a mirror as scary as it sounds.  I had to tap the wall anchors in.     I got a little nervous when I looked at the list of recommended tools for the job, though.  It included a hacksaw, pipe wrench, and pipe cutter!!  Even though I’m a little slow in the home improvement department, I quickly figured out that this was a generic list for any fixtures that this company produces, especially when one of the instructions said to be sure and cut off the water before installing the product… 

Immediately, my son got excited, and ran to his room to get his tools.  I decided to stop for a minute and help him pick out the same “tools” from his toolbox that I was going to be using.  Of course, he had to get his hard hat, too.  Maybe he was afraid I would drop the mirror on his head.   He kept asking, “What are you doing?” and “What’s that?”.  I really laughed when I said, “Hmmm…”, and then heard a little echo, “Hmmm…”   He was mimicking everything I was doing.  I’ve come to expect that, but it still fascinates me that he is watching me so closely. 

When we were finished, we had done something constructive and had some great time together.  I was just happy that it was all level and looked nice.  For me, there is a great sense of satisfaction when I’m able to do things like this, and especially when I can include the kids.

Now, I just need to schedule my projects so I can include other kids who don’t have dads around.  I would love to do that, but I do so many things on the spur of the moment.  Of course, there wasn’t room in the bathroom for too many more little hands, but I need to be thinking along those lines.

May God richly bless you today!

I’m Watching You, Dad

I have a bum finger, making it a little uncomfortable to type, plus I’m trying to get ready to preach on Sunday.  Therefore, I’m not going to write much today.  However, I do want to share this video that one of my good friends sent me yesterday.  It meant a lot coming from him because he said it reminded him of my son and me.  I actually have a picture of my son and I “mowing” the yard together like the one in the video.  Powerful message…

http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=5486ae62fd502645138e

May God bless you today!

Quality Time

I feel like I scored a major victory this weekend with my second oldest.  While trying to find some time to spend time with a little girl who lost her daddy to cancer a few years ago, I thought it would be best to include one of my daughters who is close to the same age.  I knew with the personality of this particular daughter that it wouldn’t be a problem if we took a friend along for our “Daddy / Daughter” time.  However, I was floored by the results.

I was a little late picking them up from basketball camp and they were already speculating about what we were going to do.  They were sure we were going bowling, and they were excited about that!  I never dreamed these two would have an interest in bowling, but they did.  Therefore, I deviated from my original plans and we went bowling.  It was fun, but I wanted to do something a little more interactive.  We had some time left after that, so we went to the museum.  At our county museum they have a room where kids can roll play and the adults can interact.  They have a little school room, a house with a kitchen, a general store, a teepee, and a boat among other things.  We had so much fun.  I discovered that our little friend has quite a servant heart.  She wanted to do all the “cooking” and kept serving us instead of sitting down to “eat” with us.  Of course, she has too much energy to sit and be served.  It’s amazing what we can learn about children when we take the time to do things like this.

Both girls thanked me numerous times for doing this.  However, after I dropped our friend off, my daughter kept hugging and thanking me throughout the day.  She kept looking for opportunities to do things for me, and would then hug me and say, “I can’t thank you enough daddy for taking us bowling and to the museum today.”  She called it Daddy, Daughter, Friend time, and couldn’t have been more pleased.  I’m still reaping the benefits today – I ate lunch with her and she hugged me and thanked me again.

I’m afraid I’ve been missing the mark with her up to this point, but I finally got it right by speaking her love language:  QUALITY TIME.  It has been easy for me to connect with my oldest daughter because we’re a lot alike.  It’s easy for me to connect with my son because it just comes naturally.  However, I really have to make the effort to connect to my two middle daughters, especially the one I’m writing about.  She has a totally different personality and it is easy for me to miss the mark with her.

Let me encourage you today in what I’ve learned.  It’s important to learn our childrens’ love languages.  What speaks to one child doesn’t speak to another.  They are all different and we need to be students of them in order for them to feel loved.

May God bless your efforts in learning how to speak your childrens’ love languages!